Dear Diary,
It’s been 5 days since my last entry. I feel like I should have traveled more in those days than I have. The voices have come back. It’s like people are whispering in the night interrupting my sleep and making me doubt my journey. I’m not going to lie, it’s creepy and makes me question my own sanity. My ankle still hurts from my first dull day of hiking. I thought it was better on day 3 and 4, but yesterday the wound opened again and, with it came more doubts. To top it off, my stomach hasn’t been completely right since my entire diet has changed…
Maybe I just need more time…
The forest is testing me. It’s testing my patience. My resolve… But I won’t turn around!
I think I need to try to mix things up a little though. Take some moments each day and just stand in a place where the sun breaks through the trees. I know Pepper will appreciate that as well. He’s been such an amazing companion!! He believes in me – wether it’s a good choice on his part is yet to be revealed… but he believes in me.
I think I also need to affirm myself more. It’s okay to be human. Fear is not a weakness. These initial scrapes and bruises… even the eerie voices… are all things I knew I would face. Just because I knew they’d be there doesn’t mean I needed to handle them with no emotion and defeat them effortlessly! Valor isn’t something you study and apply. It comes as a result of journeys such as this. True valor is looking a task in the face and saying, I won’t give up no matter how scared or doubtful I become.
I’m going to press on. I know I’m not there yet… I’m not even sure I know what “there” is, but I’m going to find it.
Dear Diary... 